Sneak Peek: "Chapter 1"

A couple of days ago I sat down to think about how my life became like this. I used to know exactly what I wanted and exactly how I was going to get it. I knew who I was and I had my emotions locked up behind closed doors and under control. So the other day when thinking about this, I realized that when I started college I lost myself. I let other peoples opinions dictate how my life was going and how it was going to be and before college everything was balanced (besides my grades of course), but my social life and personal life were completely balanced. I had an even amount of friends, and good ones at that. I didn't latch onto anyone, and I always let go of people when they deemed it was time. Bye! People came to me instead of me to them. I was comfortable and I was good. I only told people what they could handle and I learned lessons from others that confided in me. I kept their secrets and they did not have to worry about me telling others. I was good! Things that I was insecure about I kept to myself because I knew that people wouldn't understand them.

College is where I started making my mistakes. At first, I started off good. I stayed true to myself and was proud of it and my accomplishments. My first college friend, I didn't expect to keep, she asked to take pictures of my book for class because she did not have it yet. I didn't want to be rude, so I brought her back to my clean dorm (which was beautifully decorated by my mom) so she could take pictures of it. She picked up the book, sat down and started to look around and started asking questions like, "Where are you from? and What's your major?" you know freshmen stuff. While the entire time I just wanted her out of my room. I kept thinking of how tired and hungry I was and the fries from the dining hall. After 30 minutes, I started wondering if she forgot what she came there to do (she was supposed to be taking pictures of the homework pages and not taking the book). She asked me what I was doing for the rest of the day. Huh?! I told her that I was thinking about going to the dining hall (called Folgers) and then taking a nap. She nodded her head in an approval manner and said, "How about we eat there together and later you can take a nap, in college you are supposed to make friends, not sleep." Really!? I just nodded and gave her a sleepy smile and then grabbed my phone.